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Thursday, 23 May 2013


Excitement is mounting in the Scobi household for the impending holiday in the Isle of Wight.  Further repairs have been done to the van (need to look after my little darling after all) and I at least have started a pile of clothes to take, just so I don't accidentally wear them beforehand.  These are clothes that are smarter than my worst, but not the absolute smartest, simply because this 'vannin' lark can be a filthy business.

Work is quite hot right now.  It is mid year and that is, I am reliably informed, the best time for a mid-year review, so in preparation for that, I need to enlist troopers who will say nice things about me*, and write up my "achievements to date", which is really a list of you saying nice things about yourself. 

Outside of that, there is some of yer actual real work to do as well, which consists of trying to reverse-engineer some previously presented figures, to work out cost reductions for not doing all the stuff that the previously presented figures covered.  If that makes no sense to you, then that makes two of us.  Actually, it is not so hard, simply because, as long as you stay within "sanity margins"**, then really you can mostly make it up, since no-one is able to challenge the rights or wrongs of it.  This is slightly disingenuous to me and my kind, because there is a sort of logic to what we do, but there is also a bit of magic.  Part art, part science, that is how my mentor always called it, and I have to agree.  And the fact that it is like that, despite all the attempts by Starfleet to remove any art so it is 100% science, to then enable it to be moved offshore, is the main reason why I am still employed.  And long may it continue***.

* the process leaders would have you believe that "you get more out of it if you ask a wide circle of people, some of which will not give you such a good review, because you will learn more from that".  I say that is utter bo!!lox coz it turns in to a score which is used to quantitatively (and for quantitatively, read "cannot be sued for using this to make decisions") assess each person.
** which are defined as those that the finance lead will use to assess whether your number is high, low or just right
***  -----<< Message removed due to non-compliance  >>----

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